I've spent some time trying to reassure myself that I'm acting properly. Before I go to bed every night I think. I think about the same thing. I try to sort through it a little more.

I've collected several opinions, All from my most trusted sources. Despite the fact that they are from all over; 2 from the other side of the world; the underlying opinion has been the same.


And every night, I go through it all again.
..And the stalemate continues.
Action versus Words.

So you can imagine the shock today when over lunch the subject of my deepest thoughts was thrown onto the table beside my sandwich and milk.

I coughed, almost choking from surprise.

"...So what happened after....?"

I laid my sandwich down, reestablished my deceptive composure... and I told the truth.

"Nothing...." I said.

My response was obviously unsatisfactory. Not because it was unbelievable, but because that's not what should have been the truth.

Much to my shock a winding, involving conversation then began that I was completely unready for, much less wanting to have.

The conversation didn't turn to probing me for information as I had readied myself for. She seemed completely accepting of the truth I'd given her. Instead, she began to tell me her opinion of what I should do. How she had achieved such insight into me was beyond my understanding. But she laid it out and I found what she had to say incredibly reassuring. I smiled, "You know I love you right?" I said.

She just laughed, understanding the joke and understanding what else therein I had just confessed.

We walked back from lunch, the sun beaming down.
The lights changed stranding us at the corner.
I squinted as the Sun reflected off all the buildings around me.
A car pulled up and came to a stop as the lights changed and we began to cross the street.
A flash caught my attention, I looked at it, I looked at the car.
There, hanging from the Mirror, dangling in the windshield was a Horseshoe.

I smiled.
Maybe I should believe in signs.

I got back to work and sat down.
I spun my chair around feeling a sense of relief.
My thoughts lined up, cascading into order.

The tug of War was over.
My side had won.